Knowledgeable Month

Salam alaikum...

November left me off, stucking with Obstetrics and Surgery. As early as 6.30 in the morning, I've to wake up preparing for class. Sharp at 7.30 am, usually alone by myself, I left for metro and on my way, will suddenly met up with Fizy and Azam. Sometimes I was ahead of them, in the other time, they led the way.

I used to be a person who like to stand, not to sit, in the metro. U guys maybe know why. I know that I'm not that tall, so I just dont want those people offer me a seat just because I am small. That's why I prefer to stand, reading somethings that can fill my time, or if dont have any, I'll spend time for daydreaming. But since I have to leave at 7.30 am, obviously I didnt have enough sleep the night before because usually my time for bed is at 2-3 am. So recently my habits changed. I did my best to look for a seat. Seat is a need for me =) If i do have something that must be read even in metro, then I'll spend time there by reading, otherwise I'll sleep, for sure!

Obstetrics is an interesting subject. A tough subject but since I've Nazlin's notes and I found that I'm very interested in this subject, I didnt mind at all to sleep only for 4 hrs per day, eat less, talk less, daydream less, but to study more! My table full with Obs books. In English and even in Russian. I spent time to surf internet as well, looking for materials for the next class. My teacher, Dr. Irina Vladimirovna Ignadko is a nice, expert and warmhearted lady.

When it came to the 1st time I've to examine my patient, with my team - me, Wendy, Thines and Fizy, we recieved a patient with pre-ecalampsia and big fetus size problems. That was her 3rd pregnancy and the 2 before this were normally dilevered. Term of pregnancy was 39 weeks, meaning that she's already in her full term. Her due date is estimated around 26/12/2006. The next day, we went to the ultrasound room. Luckily again, my patient was there. And on 25/12/2006, the whole group went to the labor room to see vaginal delivery or so called as natural birth. And again, my patient was the one who's giving birth at that time!

While in the end of 1st stage of labor, she shouted out loudly:

Ya ne magu.... Ya ne magu... Ya ne magu...!
(I can't... I can't... I can't...!)

I knew she's in pain. I was touched by the situation.

Then, when she's already in the 2nd stage of delivery, when the head of the baby was already out of the vagina, hanging there like a where-are-you-coming-from-monster, my patient screamed like hell:

Ubi menya! Ubi menya!
(Kill me! Kill me!)

That showed how suffering she was at the moment.

But a few seconds after that, the whole body was out, with the umbilical cord was still connected to the placenta, it was clamped, cut off, then the baby was given to the mother to let her see her son. Yeah. He's a boy! He's a boy!

Then the placenta was checked by the doctors and the nurses started working on the baby. It's Christmas today. My christian friend said: Wah, he's the new Jesus.

Owh... Only that's simple they can say about their newborn God?? Hmm... But deep in my heart, I named the baby after my friend, Azzaki, for his curiousness about the baby. May the baby boy become a brilliant boy Insya Allah. (Azzaki - the brilliant guy).

During our last class for Obs, I have to present my project on Myopia in Pregnancy. Oh my Godness, I've 1 of the indications to be operated for Caesarean section if planning to have baby because my nearsightedness is -6.25 on my right and -6.50 on my left!!! Anyway, dont worry. Ophthalmologist will decide it for me. Ahaks! And after that, we went to see the postnatal prosedures. And again, my patient was there and her baby was in normal range of weight already. They both are healthy.

All after all, I can conclude that December is a knowledgeable month. I sacrificed a lot, but I gained a lot in return. I enjoy learning new things in class, with my funky classmates! One more secret story of mine, I actually have been working with Tourism Malaysia in Embassy of Malaysia part-timely. By end of December, guess how much that I earned? 250 USD for 6 days part-timely working there! But surely I've gone through tough days, till 11 pm been there, with extra task to set up 2 powerpoint presentations for Kak Azizah which have 143 and 33 slides each! And, somewhere around Dec 10th, I recieved Ayat-ayat Cinta, a novel that I wanted to read since months ago. It was a bit late, but I appreciated my friend's willingness to post it from Indonesia. Anyway friends, I have the original version of it, the Indonesian Language!

Ayat-ayat Cinta, a recommended book to be read, full with courage, full with enthusiasm. Very good for muhasabah, to recheck our soul and heart, is there still any LOVE for Allah the Almighty growing in there...?

Fahri, where's my Fahri?
At night, I sigh


Monday : Obstetrics
Tuesday : Surgery
Wed : Obstetrics
Thursday : Surgery
Friday : Obstetrics

Happy New Year 2007

Expectations, Interpretations, Wishes, Dreams, Lifes, Loves and Achievements

People's expectations are hard to be expected, people's interpretations are hard to be interpreted, people's wishes are hard to be wished, people's dreams are hard to be dreamt, people's lifes are hard to be lived, people's loves are hard to be loved, people's acheivements are hard to be acheived.

Pada hari Ahad lepas, sesuatu terjadi di rumahku di Malaysia. Persoalan mula bermain di benak ibu bapaku perihal kehidupan anaknya yang seorang ini. Persoalan diajukan terus padaku. Mahukah aku jika ada yang mahu? Sudikah aku jika ada yang sudi? Siap sediakah aku jika ada yang telah siap sedia mahukan diri ini? Sepenuh hatikah aku jika ada yang telah sepenuh hati hendak memberi dan berkongsi.

Sakit kepalaku (migraine) menyerang sebanyak lima kali dalam masa empat hari. Tidur lewat bukan jawapan kepada persoalan pelajaran, tetapi kerana persoalan kehidupan. Persoalan harapan dan persoalan masa depan.

Mizan tiba-tiba muncul dalam aturcara hidup yang tak pernah aku aturkan dengan baik ini. Bersimpang malaikat empat puluh empat sekalipun, takkan pernah menjadi bayangan diintai oleh lelaki muda sempurna budi pekerti ini. Pengharapan yang disuarakan langsung melalui emak dan ayah benar-benar megganggu fikiran dan pastinya hati. Tidak tenang. Marah. Geram. Keliru. Semuanya bercampur tanpa diawasi kerasionalan fikiran dan hatiku. Yang sangat aku pasti, tiada rasa yang lain yang boleh menyentuh hatiku tentang diri lelaki ini.

Dengan sangat optimis, aku sangat yakin apa jawapan yang menanti. Tapi dalam masa yang sama, aku teringatkan hadis Abu Daud yang mengatakan, jika telah datang pada kamu seorang lelaki yang baik agamanya, janganlah dikatakan tidak. Sungguh aku tersepit. Tapi pada tika yang sama juga, seluruh tubuh bersetuju dengan hatiku, mempercayai bahawa ayah dan emak jauh lebih setuju dengan keputusanku ini.

Panggilan jauh kubuat untuk mengkhabari ayah tentang keputusanku. Ayah berlapang dada dengan pilihanku. Kata ayah, putih kataku, putih juga kata mereka kerana mereka sangat tahu aku rasional dan selalu sahaja berdikari dalam membuat keputusan terbaik. Dan dengan alasan ini jugalah dulu, aku diizinkan terbang menyambung pelajaran di bumi bekas tampuk komunis, tanah kelahiran Lenin ini.

Kakakku jauh lebih berlapang dada. Kata kakakku, dia yakin Mizan bukanlah yang cocok denganku. Aku kurang setuju dengan pendapatnya. Sebetulnya, akulah yang kurang cocok buat Mizan. Akulah yang jauh kurang sempurna untuk bergandingan dengan Mizan. Akulah yang banyak cacatnya hendak dipadankan dengan Mizan.

Selepas keputusan kuserahkan pada ayah, aku bertawakkal penuh dan bergantung pada kebijaksanaan ayah untuk mengkhabari Mizan akan hal ini. Takut. Bersalah. Jahat. Menolak tuah. Rugi. Semuanya bagai bergema memarahi diri ini. Menyalahkan diri ini kerana sangat tidak bijak dalam berdiplomasi dengan hati demi masa depan iman dan taqwa. Sungguh Ya Allah. Aku ini hamba yang tidak pandai mensyukuri!

Kelmarin aku melayari internet seperti biasa. Yahoo! Mesenggerku aktif seperti biasa. Yang kucari tidak online. Ataupun dia meng'invisible'kan dirinya? Aku tunggu beberapa minit lagi. Tiada juga. Mungkin dia sedang mengulang kaji pelajaran. Tak mengapa. Pasti ada sahabat lain yang boleh kukongsikan berita menikam jiwa ini.

Abang Zulkhairi menegurku di YM. Seperti yang dirancang Allah, ketika aku mencari orang terdekat untuk bercerita, abangku yang seorang ini online pula.

Suraya:Salam Abg Zul. Tgh buat apa tu?
Abg Zul:Salam Suraya. Tengah teringatkan adik abg nila. Suraya tengah buat apa tu? Abg sakit kepala dgn roommates abg yg tgh ribut2 di sini.
Suraya:Ada apa2 function ke mlm ni? kenapa ribut2 pula?
Abg Zul:Diorg tgh siap2kan bekalan makan utk ke winter camp dgn kwn2 dr Dublin esok.Maybe diorg sume ke Belfast.
Suraya:ooo..yeke. Abg x join ke? Ni sah malas ni. Huhu.
Abg Zul:Abg ada hal la dlm minggu ni. x dapat nk join diorg. Dr pegi sana, baik abg saving gi Moscow bulan 4 ni. Kan? =p
Suraya:Yea yea! Happy ni! Ala..abg ni kadang2 tu cakap aje lebih. Buatnye x jgk. Allah x suka org buat camtu k.. Dlm Quran pun ada cakap psl ni tau. Ngeh3.. Mcm ala2 penceramah plak sy ni. Hihi...
Abg Zul:Ala..x pelik..Mmg adik abg ni dh mcm penceramah bebas pun! Ntah2 nnti kawin dgn ustaz2 mana plak dia ni. Hehe..
Suraya: Uih.. Iye sangat la tu abg oiii...

Sebermula dari titik itu, aku mula menjuruskan perbualan kami kepada persoalan yang mengganggu hatiku. Tambahan, bukannya Abang Zul tidak kenal akan Mizan, rakan lama sewaktu di tingkatan menengah atas dulu. Betapa kecilnya dunia di matamu, Ya Allah.

Hampir tepat 1 jam berinteraksi bersama Abang Zul di alam maya ini, tiba-tiba isyarat kelihatan menyatakan "Mizan is now online". Tersentak aku. Terkejut Abang Zul. Terdiam kami.

Aku ambil keputusan untuk membutakan mata dengan kewujudannya dalam senarai YM ku. Tetapi, lain yang dirancang, lain pula yang terjadi.

Mizan:Salam, apa khabar Suraya.
Suraya:Salam. Baik2 aje.
Mizan:Hmm

Suasana sepi seketika...

Suraya:Sy rasa dgn berdiam diri bukanlah jalan yg terbaik. Sy mintak maaf. Bukan sy sengaja. Tp sy ada reason tersndiri knp sy buat keputusan mcm tu. Maaf sgt2 bro.
Mizan:Hmm
Suraya:Hmm tu seperti marah bunyinya.
Mizan:Sy x marah Su. Sy pun dapat jangka sebenarnya. Sy tau siapa yg sy harapkan ni. Klu Su dgn sy, bagai langit dgn bumi. Sy just mencuba, mencuba yg terbaik, utk dapatkan yg terbaik. Sbb bg sy, sy nmpak Su lah yg terbaik. Tp x pe... Allah dh tertukan ini yg trbaik pula utk kita.
Suraya:Hmm... Maaf skali lg bro. Sy x tau apa yg patut sy cakap lg.
Mizan:Hmm... Su, sy ada 1 soalan ni. Sy harap Su boleh jawab.
Suraya:Iya.. Apa dia?
Mizan:Klu sy kata yg sy akan tetap tunggu Su sampailah Su boleh yakinkan sy yg Su akn kawin dgn org lain, Su stuju x mcm tu? n seandainya Su masih belum menjumpai sapa2, adakah Su akn berikn peluang tu pd sy?

Diam lagi.

Aku menghubungi Abang Zulkhairi kembali.

Abg Zul:Ye Suraya. Kenapa?
Suraya:Abg, Mizan tgh online ni n dia kata mcm ni:
Suraya:Mizan:Hmm... Su, sy ada 1 soalan ni. Sy harap Su boleh jawab.
Suraya:Iya.. Apa dia?
Mizan:Klu sy kata yg sy akan tetap tunggu Su sampailah Su boleh yakinkan sy yg Su akn kawin dgn org lain, Su stuju x mcm tu? n seandainya Su masih belum menjumpai sapa2, adakah Su akn berikn peluang tu pd sy?
Suraya:Ni sy paste kan apa dia kata td. Abg Zul, mcm mana ni? Abg misti tau sy mcm mana kan? Sy x mau. Sy sgt jelas sgn tindakan sy skrg. :((
Abg Zul:Suraya tenang2 aje k.. Biar abg yg try cakap dgn dia. Manalah tau kan. Kot2 abg ni berguna jgk. Huhu. Suraya x payah jawab apa2 lg pd dia. Biar abg yg online dgn dia. Gimme time k.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Seketika masa berlalu.

Mizan:Su, ada x tu?
Suraya:Iye. Ada aja ni. Maaf bro, sy x dpt fikirkan jawapan terbaik nk bgtau bro. Hmm.
Mizan:x pe Su. Sy faham. Klu la dr awal sy tau cerita sebenar ni, munglin sy x kn seberani ni utk cakap semua ni pd Su.
Suraya:Bro tau apa?
Mizan:Su dgn Zul.
Suraya:Sy dgn Abg Zul? Apa yg bro tau?
Mizan:Haah. Td Zul dh terangkan semuanya. Sy kenal Zul tu mcm mana orgnye. Dia antara org yg paling bagus prinsip hidupnya yg sy kenal. Su jgn risau. Sy tau apa hak seorg sahabat pd sahabatnya. Mcm dulu waktu Su dgn Eizil. Sy tau walaupun dh lama sy cuba utk mendekati Su, tp sbb sahabat sy yg tu jauh lebih lama menyimpan hati pd Su, sy cuba menjadi org terbaik utk Eizil berkongsi masalah. Dr situ sy rasa makin dekat dgn Su, walaupun sbnarnya Su jauh, jauh dlm hati Eizil, sungguhpun skrg baik Su mahupun Eizil ada jln hidup masing2.
Suraya:So skrg, apa yg bro dh tau dr Abg Zul?
Mizan:Dia yg terbaik. Sy yakin tu. Dia sgt2 bagus orgnya. Since f4 lg. Su jgn risau. Sy tau mcm mana nk handle diri. Su doakanlah yg terbaik utk sy. Insya Allah sy ok aje ni.
Suraya:Terima kasih bro. Sy x tau nak cakap apa dh ni. Terima kasih sgt2.
Mizan:x de apa yg perlu diterimakasihkan. Terima n kasihkanlah dia. Dia jg sahabat sy. Ok Su. Sy kluar dulu. Klu ada apa2 perkembangan, sudi2lah bgtau pd sy. Insya Allah no. tel sy x bertukar kot.
Suraya:Insya Allah bro.
Mizan:Take care. Gd nite. Salam
Suraya:Salam.

Aku terpegun. Terkesima. Terdiam. Apa yang telah Abang Zul katakan pada Mizan? Apa yang menjadi buah bualan mereka? Apa yang boleh mengubah hati Mizan? Aku masih terdiam. Tidak berani mengajukan solan ini pada Abang Zul. Apapun kini, aku semakin kenal siapa Mizan sebenarnya. Dia memang seorang yang sempurna. Sempurna akhlak dan bahasa. Sempurna jiwa dan hati. Mulianya hati Mizan hanya Allah yang dapat membalasnya. Doaku, aku tidak kekok andai satu hari nanti ditakdirkan bertemu dengannya.

Abang Zul menegurku.

Abg Zul:U there?
Suraya:Yup. Im here.
Abg Zul:Hmm.. I guess dat I've settled evrthg for u.
Suraya:But how?
Abg Zul:Alah adik abg ni. Takkan Mizan x cakap apa2 td? Dgn abg td, dia sungguh2 mintak maaf sbb dia kata dia x tau langsung psl kita.
Suraya:Eh, chop3. Pasal kita? Apanya pasal kita pulak ni? Adui... Pening2.
Abg Zul:Hihi. Cuba Suraya tengok status abg mlm ni. Tadaaaaaa!

Aku klik untuk melihat kotak utama YM ku. Dalam senaraiku pada malam ini, hampir 54 orang kawan sedang aktif menggunakan YM mereka. Tetapi majority sedang "Idle". Pasti sudah tidur. Mataku mencari-cari nama Abg Zul. Tapi tiada dalam kategori "Friends" yang biasanya digunakan bagi kategori rakan-rakan di Malaysia atau di luar negara. Bagi rakan-rakan di Russia pula, aku kategorikan mereka dalam "Russia".

Aku melilau ke bahagian "Russia" pula. Ha! Ketemu juga akhirnya. Sejak bila pula aku tersalah mengkategorikan kawan-kawanku ini? Aku tersenyum seorang dengan kecuaian yang tidak pernah aku sedari sudah sekian lama ini.

Tiba-tiba aku tersentak. Apa? Status Abang Zul sangat pelik bunyinya. "I'm married today. So?". Hanya Allah yang tahu betapa aku terkejut setelah mulai faham apa yang telah dikatakan Abang Zul kepada Mizan. Ya Allah. Kesian sungguh Mizan. Ya Allah. Apa sajalah yang telah Abang Zul lakukan ini. Ya Allah, patutkah aku tersenyum? Atau marah? Atau ketawa kerana lucu? Atau terkejut? Ya Allah. Sungguh aku kasihan pada Mizan...

Suraya:Abg zul. U there?
Abg Zul:Yup dear. Alwys here.
Suraya:Apa ajelah abg ni. Daring nye buat mcm tu. Huhu...
Abg Zul:Ala... Utk adik abg ni jgk kan.
Suraya:Isy..Kalaula Kak Amalina tau ni, mati sy nnti!
Abg Zul:Ala... Suraya kan tau mcm mana abg dgn Kak Amal skrg. Kami ada plan n prinsip kami. Lagipun, Kak Amal akn tau jgk apa abg buat ni. Abg ni kan takde rahsia2 dgn dia. Hihihi. Abg takut Suraya je yg ada prob nanti klu berani buat mcm abg ni. Huahuahua!
Suraya:Ala... Mana ada org nak intai setiap apa status sy stiap hari. Sy ni bukan mcm abg. Abg tu hot stuff! Sume org pandang.
Abg Zul:Elehhhh... Mcm iye je dia berani buat. Huhuhuhuhuhuhu.
Suraya:Hey x baik gelak. Tengok la nnti...

Aku nekad. Aku lihat kembali senarai di YM ku. Ada! Nama Mizan masih aktif. Aku nekad. Aku mesti meneruskan apa yang telah bermula ini. Kulihat jam di sisi laptopku. Jam 12.35 am 28 Disember 2006. Benar. Aku nekad!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Asmawi:Salam Su
Suraya:Salam. Iye?
Asmawi:Betul ke tu?
Suraya:Apa dia?
Asmawi:Ur status. Sounds great.
Suraya: =)
Asmawi:Wah... Congrats!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Fairuz:Salam
Suraya:Salam Fairuz
Fairuz:Betul ke ni? Wah...Lg awal dr sy ni! Tahniah2.
Suraya:Hmm... Ntah nak kata mcm mana. It happened so sudden.
Fairuz:Apapun, tahniah2! Bagus2. Dr bercouple je kn. Baik kawin terus. Status tu patutnye bunyi mcm ni "I'm married today. So dont u guys wanna wish me something?"
Suraya: =)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Huda:Salam Su
Suraya:Salam Huda.
Huda:Gila best! Tahniah2. I'm proud of u!
Suraya: ni misti Fairuz yg bgtau kn?
Huda:Abis tu sape lg. Bila awk kawin ni? Knp x bgtau awal2? Gila best ni. Sy dh agak dh. Awak sah kawin awal punya!
Suraya:Eh, kenapa camtu plak? Apapun Huda, rahsiakan dulu hal ni. Bukan utk dihebohkan tau.
Huda:Okes Su! No prob!!
Suraya:Terima kasih. Utk awk n Fairuz, doa byk2 ye. Moga Allah lembutkan hati ayah awak n fmly dia.
Huda:Thanks bangat deh!!!! Okay.. Selamat pengantin baru ye Su. Nite. Salam.
Suraya:Nite, Salam.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Aku teringat akan cadangan Fairuz. Lalu aku lihat jam sekali lagi. Aku yakin, di saat ini, jam 1.15 am, tiada siapa yang sedar akan statusku yang berbunyi pelik ini. Lalu aku tukar status itu kepada "I'm married today. So dont u guys wanna wish me something?" Lalu aku hubungi kembali Abang Zul.

Suraya:Tadaaaa. Tengok status sy. Lg best. Hikhikhik
Abg Zul:Waaaaahhh.. Ni kalahla abg mcm ni.
Suraya:Hehe. Apapun terima kasih ye abg zul. Abg banyak betul dh tolong sy. Ni yg best ada abg yg sporting mcm abg ni. Sayang betul sy kt abg.
Abg Zul:Suraya kan adik abg. Abg akn buat apa yg boleh utk tolong adik abg ni. (walaupun abg tau apa abg buat ni melampau banyak! Ahaks)
Suraya: =) terima kasih banyak2 ye. Abg tgh buat apa tu?
Abg Zul:Tengah belek2 gambar lama. Gambar lama kita dulu2. Di sekolah. Di rumah Khafiz, di taman, waktu jalan2, waktu pegi KFC sama2 dgn Syarafie dulu. Tak sangka plak byk jgk ye gambar yg abg still simpan. Hihi. Suraya plak tgh buat apa tu?
Suraya:Sy pun still ada semua gambar2 tu. Actly sy tengah siapkan last report on Obstetrics ni. Esok sy kena buat presentation dlm kelas. Pastu myb gi tgk delivery lg. Abg nak tau. Stiap kali tgk delivery, sy rasa nak nangis. Bukan sbb x tahan tgk, tp sy tringat kt mak sy tau. Rindu sgt2 ni.
Abg Zul:Ingatkan rindu pd Kamarul je! Huhuhu.
Suraya:Eh, kesitu plak dia. Mana ada. Abg tau sy mcm mana kn. Uwaaa.......
Abg Zul:Yup, i know u, n dats y abg x nak ada org sakitkan hati adik abg ni.
Suraya:Thanks sgt2 abg zul. Abg mmg slalu jd org 1st yg tau prob sy.
Abg Zul:Alaaa... Jgn la cakap mcm tu. Abg kn abg Suraya. Susah senang adik abg ni, abg misti nk tau, n akn tolong mana yg patut. Suraya, kawan2 abg dh nak bertolak ke winter camp tu. Abg undur diri dulu ye. Nanti senang kita online lg. Doa selalu tau. Tu senjata kita semua.
Suraya:Okay abg zul. Salam buat kwn2 abg. Doa doa doa. Nasihat abg tu dh sebati dlm diri sy. U take care k.
Abg Zul:Okay.. U too.. Nite.. Sweet dream Suraya. Adik abg sntiasa jd sumber inspirasi abg sbb adik abg ni tabah orgnya. Salam.
Suraya:Thanks abg zul. Salam.



Buat yang sudah faham situasi sebenar yang terjadi, saya harap cerita ini dapat memberikan penjelasan yang terbaik buat semua. Saya masih seperti ini. Tiada yang menjadikan saya lain dari saya yang dulu. Buat Mek La, Amy dan yang lain-lain di Nizhny, saya tahu kenapa cepat benar tersebarnya cerita-cerita yang boleh dikategorikan 'hot stuff' ini. Kerana adanya internet dan Husna! Apapun, saya sungguh tak menyangka status pada jam 12.35 am itu ada juga yang menyedarinya. Rajin betul korang semua stay up study sampai pagi buta ye. Nak exam ye? All the best to all!

Bagi yang tak faham dengan cerita ini, anggaplah ini sekadar cerpen ringkas hadiah dari saya sebagai penutup koleksi tulisan saya untuk tahun 2006 ini. Koleksi cerpen yang lebih mantap Insya Allah akan menyusul pada tahun depan. Lagipun, korang semua masih belum tahu siapa dia orang yang saya nantikan kemunculannya di YM tu =p

Salam eidul adha buat semua. Belajarlah erti bekorban. Semoga kisah Nabi Ibrahim dan puteranya membuka hati kita untuk membuat sedikit pengorbanan kecil dalam membantu saudara-saudara seiman dengan kita di Palestin dan di mana-mana jua.

Salam tahun baru 2007. Semoga misi dan visi yang baru telah disiapsediakan sebagai persedian minda dan menyediakan bekalan ruhani yang secukupnya untuk santapan jiwa.


Salam dari Moscow,
Sarah Mohd Shukor
\(^_^)/

Cebisan Kenangan

Tak pernah terbayang akan menjadi rapat dengan bakal angkasawan negara ini.
Tak pernah terjangka pertemuan pertama membawa siri pertemuan yang seterusnya.
Tak pernah terjangkau akan sentiasa berpeluang mengetahui perkembangan terkini mereka.
Tak pernah terfikir akan keluar berjalan-jalan dengan mereka.
Tak pernah terlintas akan menemani mereka berlibur dan berhibur.
Tak pernah terhitung apa pula yang menanti apabila mereka telah benar-benar bergelar ANGKASAWAN NEGARA.

Assalamualaikum wbt,

Sekadar coretan ketika termenung di malam hari menyudahkan patient's case history on surgery. Apapun yang menanti di masa depan, walaupun tidak lagi rapat seperti kini, pasti akan ada juga cebisan kenangan di dalam hati dan minda mereka, harapnya...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CazUpDXzhs4

(credit to KI for the photo)

Salam Buat Ijat...

Salam Ijat,

A strong reason for why u were here before, and why u are not here anymore. Due to some circumstances, life doesn't mean we get what we want, we do what we like, we love what we have. But life is about evaluating the best things that happened in our life thus we can learn from them. And about analyzing the wrongs to gain the corrects from them. And about completing the emptiness to make it bright with the fullness. Things happen for a reason. Hikmah is waiting for u ahead. Whatever it is, now, u have much more time to spend with ur mama rite? Akak already half way doing my task here, completing the emptiness, alone by myself, everyday, every moment. My true friend at the moment: INTERNET. NOT TURNING BACK is my motto. Hmmm. At least I can use it to encourage me to stay here for another 2 years in this cold-windy little Moscow, as icy as the snow falling down out there...

Regards,
Kak Sarah

Enjoyable Month

Assalamualaikum wbt

November comes with cold,
Hide in wind,
Blur in haze,
Icy in snow,
Boring with the new cycle,
Not adventerous in subject,
Happy in mood,
Cooking with intentions,
Eating with fun,
Stuck on the net,
Busy with personals,
Lazy in mind,
Sad in heart,
Lonely in life.


Monday: Therapy
Teusday: -
Wednesday: Therapy
Thursday: -
Friday: Therapy
Saturday: -
Sunday: -


(November 17, 2006)

Eid Mubarak...In the Real Meaning

" Ya Allah, andai ingin Kau berikanku nikmah, janganlah Kau lalaikan aku dengan nikmahmu itu. Ya Allah, andai nikmahMu itu akan menjauhkan aku dariMu, Kau tariklah ia kembali dariku agar aku benar-benar mensyukuri segala apa yang telah sedia ada padaku dengan seikhlas hati dan agar hatiku tidak lari dari jalanMu, jalan yang Kau janjikan di akhirnya ada nikmah terbesar. Amin"

Salam alaikum

Summary Of Eid Mubarak

22/10
Takbir in room. Syahdu. Tomorrow I'll have class. Can't join the rest in embassy.

23/10

Solat sunnat in the room and prepared to class. Breakfast a bit, everything was prepared by my roommates. Nasi himpit & kuah kacang, soto, laksa penang (my part) and a few more. Without Baju Raya, I took bus to class (eventhough it's only walking distance from my room). Attended Neurology lecture with Faisal, then to Neurology class, went to patient, discussed with him about his Polyneuropathy, jot down important notes for patient' s case history. NOTE: Have to submit by end of this week. After class, went to Endocrinology lecture in diff. hospital. Then, with my groupmates (yg memang sangat best!), we went to the bowling centre. Celebrate our raya there. Then went to Meor and Thines' house. 1st thing i did: called my family. Raya in Malaysia will be tomorrow. There we cooked, solat and ate together there. All group members were there (muslims). At that time, I realized that that's the real feeling of becoming a medical student in overseas, celebrating raya in class, celebrate with whatever food that we have, as simple as it sounds, but as meaningful as what we are supposed to. At night in my room, we invited friends to come (especially 2nd year students) and we talked about our memories during Hari Raya in Malaysia in childhood. Time runs fastly...

29/10
Open room in 205! I made it in purposed, for Iman Al-wahdy, my Indonesian friend that I'm close with. Alhamdulillah, mission completed (^^,) Imen and Ineas, my Tunisian friends came too, as well as Usamah, Annas and Ibrahim, the three siblings from Syria. My batchmates came and we had a great time together. And 1 guest from M2 also came. Abg Khairil really made it. Rezeki dia la kot dapat jumpa my Tunisian friends. Hehe.

11/11
Baked 4 chocolate cakes moist and 4 tupperwares of pudding triffle for PPIM and KUMOSC Open House tomorrow afternoon. Only me and Wani were in the room. The rest went to Aidil Vaali Celebration organizes by SMSA. They came back with 5 little turtles for me. Didn't sleep at all for the whole night.

12/11
PPIM and KUMOSC Open House in embassy. A great time working with the rest. 1st time wearing my Baju Raya that I brought. No meaning anymore. Hmm...

Here are some pics.
Time: Throughout Syawal
Veneu: Diff. places, mostly in Moscow, but some are in Malaysia (from my family)

p/s: OK. Gambar terabur lagi sekali. Saya dah malas nak edit semula entry lama ni :p

(November 15, 2006)

My Name In Russian...Cool!

Your Russian Name Is...

Anya Agnessa Sokolov

What's Your Russian Name?

Compatible Month

Salam alaikum

September ended with calmness, happiness and smiles on my face (^-^) Allah promised us to give the happiness after undergoing all the dificulties (Al-Insyirah : 1-8) October started with fresh mind and strong spirit. Neurology is an interesting subject. So many things that before this were so blur to me, now, with those proved evidences, clearly explained to me the pathogenesis of a few diseases that always come up in my mind with a question : Why does it like that?

Recently, in between the last September's cycle and the October's cycle, I've got 1 day off to go to the library, and of course, to rest at home. I spent a few hours watching "One Litre of Tears", a Japanese Siries. A touching drama about a girl named Aya (that's why I wanted so much to watch it after my cousin Nisa promoted it to me. Aya - my name in KISAS).

She suffered from a neurologic disease called Spinocerebellar Atrophy. A serious degenarative disorder of the cerebellum which later on will involve the spinal cord as well, that results in inability of the patients to control their movements by intention, to walk properly which finally will completely unable to walk or talk or to perform any other daily activities. And even, they can't individually control their urination, which means that they may urinate at any time, in any place. And because they have loss their ability to control the body balance, among the very 1st symptom that may be seen is a falling down situation without using their hands to balance it up during the process. Usually when normal people fall down, we will use our hands to protect our faces (or head more specific) from any injury. But in those patients, we can see that when they fall down, there is no wound or any injury on their palms or hands because they don't use them for protection. They will straight away fall down without the ability to move their hands to balance up or to protect their head.

While watching the drama, many questions came up. I became more interested in it. And since the new cycle started, I really pay attention on it, especially on Neurology. Seems to me that this is a busy cycle as well as the previous one but since Neurology attracts me a lot, I don't mind spending much more time studying in the room. LIFE WITH BOOKS IS MARVELLOUS!

I am now doing my report on my patient suffered from Polyneuropathy - loss of sensation in distal parts of hands and legs. Examining him makes me think : Thanks Allah for the nikmah that You gave me.

Tears drop down in the dark, warming my hand and heart... Not enough to reach 1 litre, but adequate enough to make me ponder...


Monday : Neurology, Endocrinology
Tuesday: Dermatology
Wednesday: Neurology, Endocrinology
Thursday : Dermatology
Friday : Neurology, Endocrinology
Saturday : Radiology (till Oct. 14)


(October 20, 2006)

Perkara Yang Tidak dan Membatalkan Puasa

Terlalu ramai umat Islam yg keliru dengan perkara-perkara ibadah, lebih-lebih lagi bab ibadah puasa. Bukankah sudah jelas melalui dari Al-Quran dan Sunnah yg sahih, perkara-perkara yg membatalkan puasa seperti penerangan di bawah ini.

( From the 9th Fiqh-Medical Seminar, convened at Casablanca, Morocco, during 8-11 Safar 1418, corresponding to 14-17 June 1997, under the eminent auspices of the Commander of the Faith- ful, His Majesty King Hassan II. The theme of the seminar was “An Islamic View of Certain Contemporary Medical Issues”, and it was held jointly with the Hassan II Institute for Scientific and Medical Research on Ramadhan, the ISESCO, the Islamic Fiqh Academy, and the World Health Organisation Regional Office.) [Artikel diambil dari Seminar Fekah Perubatan ke 9 yang diadakan di Casablanca, Morroco, 8-11 Safar 1418 bersamaan 14-17 Jun 1997.] (Substances and actions that nullify the fasting)

Bahan-bahan yang boleh membatalkan Puasa

(According to the Quran and the authentic Sunnah of The Prophet (pbuh) three actions nullify fasting: eating, drinking and sexual intercourse. Therefore, the passing of any solid or liquid sybstance that can be described as food or drink, in any quantity through the gullet would nullify fasting. [Menurut Al Quran dan Hadis yang sahih dari Nabi Muhammad SAW, tiga perlakuan yang boleh membatalkan puasa: Makan, minum, dan melakukan hubungan seks. Oleh yang sedemikian, apa-apa bahan yang dapat melalui rongga samada berbentuk pepejal atau cecair dalam apa jumlah sekalipun, ianya boleh membatalkan puasa.]

Accordingly, the participants agreed unanimously that the following do not nulIify fasting).
Menurut ahli majlis/peserta seminar tersebut dan telah sepakat bersetuju bahawa perkara-perkara berikut TIDAK MEMBATALKAN PUASA

1. Eye and ear drops, and ear wash.
   Ubat titis mata, titis telinga dan basuh telinga
2. Nitroglycerine tablets placed under the tongue for the treatment of angina.
   Ubat tablet Bawah lidah yang digunakan oleh pesakit Angina (Jantung).
3. Insertion into the vagina of pessaries, medical ovules, vaginal washes, vaginal speculum, and doctor’s or midwife’s fingers during pelvic examination.
   Memasukkan ubat melalui faraj, memasukan alat perubatan, membasuh, spekulum dan jari doktor atau bidan semasa pemeriksaan vagina (sebelum bersalin).
4. Insertion of the urethroscope into man or woman radio-opaque media for X-ray diagnosis or bladder irrigation.
   Memasukkan teropong kesalur kencing lelaki atau perempuan untuk penyediaan xray.
5. Tooth drilling, extraction, cleaning or the use of mis-~ and toothbursh, provided nothing is swallowed into the stomach, do not nullify fasting.
   Menampal, mencabut, mengorek dan mencuci gigi atau menggunakan alatan dan berus gigi, dengan syarat TIADA apa-apa bahan yang memasuki perut dari prosedur tersebut.
6. Injections through the skin or muscle or joints or veins, with the exception of intravenous feeding.
   Suntikan melalui kulit, otot, sendi atau pembuluh darah, KECUALI memberi makanan melalui pembuluh darah.
7. Blood donation or receiving blood transfusion.
   Penderma atau menerima pemindahan darah.
8. Oxygen and anaesthetic gases.
   Oksigen dan Gas Bius.
9. All substances absorbed into the body through the skin, such as creams, ointments, and medicated plaster.
   Semua jenis bahan yang boleh menyerap kedalam badan melalui kulit seperti krim, jelly atau plaster berubat.
10. Drawing blood samples for laboratory testing.
    Mengambil sampel darah untuk ujian makmal.
11. Catheter and media for arteriography of heart or other organs.
    Sesalur dan bahan perantara untuk arteriografi (pemeriksaan xray khas jantung) atau organ lain.
12. Endoscopy for diagnostic or intervention purposes.
    Teropong dalam rongga perut (endiskopi) untuk mencari punca penyakit.
13. Mouth wash, gargle or oral spray, provided nothing is swallowed into the stomach.
    Membasuh mulut, berkumur atau semburan mulut, dengan syarat tiada bahan masuk kedalam perut.
14. Hysteroscopy or insertion of an intrauterine device.
    Teropong ke dalam salur peranakan atau memasukkan alat kedalamnya. (ie. UICD)
15. Biopsy of the liver or other organs.
    Mengambil tisu (biopsi) hati atau organ lain.

A majority of participants added the following:
Majority peserta menambah perkara berikut TIDAK MEMBATALKAN PUASA

1. Nose drops, nose sprays, and inhalers.
   Ubat titis hidung, semburan hidung and ubat sedut.
2. Anal injections, anoscopes, or digital rectal examination.
   Suntikan kedalm dubur, teropong dan pemeriksaan digital ke dalam dubur.
3. Surgery involving general anaesthetic, if the patient decided to fast.
   Pembedahan yeng melibatkan bius sepenuhnya jika pesakit mengambil keputusan untuk berpuasa.
4. Machine or intraperitoneal renal dialysis.
   Mesin atau dialisis buah pinggang melalui perut
5. Use of gastroscope, provided it does not entail the introduction of liquids or other substances into the stomach.[Penggunaan teropong perut, dengan syarat tidak memasukkan apa-apa bahan cecair atau bahan seumpamanya kedalam perut.]

Wallahu a'lam bissawab...


(October 7, 2006)

Hikmah Di Sebalik Dugaan

ORANG yang ditimpa sesuatu bencana hendaklah tabah menghadapinya. Ia adalah ketentuan dan ujian Allah kepada umatnya. Ada banyak hikmat di sebalik sesuatu ujian atau dugaan yang diberikan Allah kepada umat manusia.

Rasulullah menerangkan dalam beberapa hadis mengenai perkara itu, antaranya:

Abu Sa'id al-Khudri dan Abu Hurairah berkata, bahawa Rasulullah bersabda: "Tidak ada sesuatu yang menimpa seseorang Islam sama ada kepenatan, kesakitan, kesusahan memikirkan perkara yang akan datang, kedukaan, sesuatu yang menyakiti atau kesusahan mengingatkan apa yang telah berlaku hinggakan tikaman duri yang mencucuknya, melainkan Allah hapuskan dengan sebabnya sebahagian daripada dosanya." (Hadis riwayat Bukhari dan Muslim)

Abdullah bin Mas'ud berkata, Rasulullah bersabda: "Tidak ada seseorang Islam yang ditimpa sesuatu yang menyakiti, iaitu penyakit atau lainnya, melainkan Allah gugurkan dengan sebab itu dosa-dosanya, sebagaimana pokok menggugurkan daunnya (pada musimnya yang tertentu)." (Hadis riwayat Bukhari dan Muslim)

Anas berkata, Rasulullah bersabda: "Bahawa besarnya sesuatu balasan itu menurut besarnya sesuatu bencana ujian; dan bahawa Allah apabila mengasihi sesuatu kaum diuji mereka; kemudian sesiapa yang menerima ujian itu dengan reda, maka dia akan beroleh keredaan Allah, dan sesiapa yang bersikap keluh kesah serta benci menerima ujian itu, maka dia akan mendapat kemurkaan dari Allah." (Hadis riwayat at-Tarmizi dan Ibn Majah)

Syaddad bin Aus dan Al-Sunabihi berkata, bahawa kedua-duanya masuk melawat seorang sakit, lalu mereka bertanya kepadanya: "Bagaimana keadaanmu pagi ini?" Dia menjawab: "Aku berada dalam keadaan baik." Syaddad berkata kepadanya: "Bergembiralah engkau dengan perkara-perkara yang menghapuskan dosa-dosa dan menggugurkan kesalahan, kerana aku telah mendengar Rasulullah bersabda: “Sesungguhnya Allah berfirman yang bermaksud: “Apabila Aku menguji seseorang daripada hamba-Ku yang mukmin dengan sesuatu penyakit, lalu ia memuji-Ku kerana ujian-Ku itu maka sesungguhnya dia akan bangkit dari tempat baringnya itu seperti masa dia dilahirkan oleh ibunya, bersih daripada segala kesalahan', dan Allah berfirman kepada malaikat penulis amal orang itu: “Aku telah mengikat hamba-Ku itu dan telah mengujinya, maka lakukanlah kepadanya apa yang kamu biasa lakukan untuknya (menulis amal baiknya) ketika dia berkeadaan sihat." (Imam Ahmad)

Anas berkata, Rasulullah bersabda: "Jangan sekali-kali seseorang kamu bercita-cita hendakkan mati kerana sesuatu bencana yang menimpanya; kalau keadaan mendesaknya meminta mati, maka hendaklah dia memohon dengan berkata: 'Ya Tuhanku, hidupkan aku selagi hidup itu lebih baik bagiku, dan matikanlah aku apabila mati itu lebih baik bagiku." (Hadis riwayat Bukhari dan Muslim)

Segala bencana, penyakit, kesusahan atau kerunsingan yang menimpa tubuh badan atau akal fikiran seseorang mukmin adalah menjadi "Kaffarah" (penghapus) kekotoran dosa dan kesalahan orang yang ditimpa bencana itu.

Sesiapa yang menyifatkan bala bencana yang menimpanya sebagai nikmat dan menerimanya dengan reda akan mendapat balasan pahala daripada Allah, selain terhapus kekotoran dosa dan kesalahannya.

(October 1, 2006)

Miserable Month

Salam alaikum

September started with a bundle of stones on my shoulders, a rack of books on my head and a mountain of ice as my pathway. A very tough cycle to go through. Every morning I wake up at 6am. Subuh. Breakfast. Study. Prepare to class. Leave for class at 8.15am. Will be at hospital till 4.30pm. Reach home at 5pm. Asar. Eat with roommates. Rest for 30mnt. STUDY up to 3am.

Monday :Urology, Medical Genetics
Tuesday:Hygeine, Topography Anatomy
Wedn :Urology, Medical Genetics
Thurs :Hygeine, Topography Anatomy
Friday :Topography Anatomy
Sat :Radiology, Hygeine

It's so pack. No time for myself. So busy with TopAn. So tension with Hygeine. So boring with Med. Gen. So wasting time with Radio. But so enjoy with Urology. Whatever it is, I like TopAn eventhough it's difficult, in Russian some more, and it's early in the morning. But everytime we have to do the stitching thing, we enjoy it very much! Look like a surgeon (perasan! baru buat herniectomy and anastomoses of small intestine aje...huhuhu).

It's Ramadhan now. Quote of the day : Looking for the Lailatul Qadr...

Let's wait how much I'll loss weight this time. (^^,)

Till then, wake me up when September ends...


(September 26, 2006)

Summary of My Life in Summer Holiday 2006

28/06
Reached Malaysia safely, wish to have a good holiday

02-23/07
Practical in Temerloh Hospital. Met Mr. Jeffri. A very good surgeon but he was so strict to me. U guys know why? Because i was the very 1st student attched to his department. My life was so miserable back there during the whole 3 weeks practical with him. Only 1 thing seemed good to me. Towards the end of the practical term, he was so nice to me. I mean, at least he smiled and could have a 15-minute conversation with him about life. He's a bachelor anyway.

28/07
Genting trip with Faisal, Farah, Smoque, Posto, Nazlin and Muiz. 1 day trip and spent time with Faisal and Nazlin (espeacially) turned me back to my normal 'Sarah'. Never imagined before that guy would cry riding on the Solero Shot! Well, its normal I guess, for those who don't like adventures. [Abg wan, I wanna go with u to have our 1st banjee jumping in NZ!!!]

03/08
Trip to Kuantan, picked up Olya (friend from Moscow) and checked in at Vistana Hotel Kuantan. Went to Jom Heboh Kuantan with Olya and Munir as well ;) At night, I called my cousin Mirul, to join me and Olya having our dinner at a fishermen village. Mirul came with Iskandar, his coursemate. Really enjoyed our seafood dishes.

04-09/08
Trip to Tioman Island. The 1st ever trip to island in my life (exception for Langkawi and Penang). Took express bus with Olya from Kuantan to Mersing. Rode an express boat to the Island and met up with Farah, Faisal, Nazlin, Smoque, Asrul and Mubin at the challet. What a wonderful island. Me and Olya were in the same room. We shared stories at night, ate and learnt languages together and many more. Went for snorkling, jugle tracking, barbequeing, telling stories, playing traditional games and so much fun we had there. Really made a good accompany with Olya and the rest as well. So much fun and happiness in Tioman. Last day, [Kak Long's birthday] went back to Kuantan by taxi with Farah, Smoque and Olya. Then i took expess bus to Temerloh. Just like a backpacker!

11-14/08
To Gombak. Summer camp 2005 organized by IMAM-MSC. Met Poknik again. Really happy. He remembered me because we have known each other since 1999. Yuhuu. Got sick there. No voice. High fever. But still enjoying the camp. Met new friends from all over Russia who came back for holiday in Malaysia.

18-23/08
Went back to Penang. 4 years i left it. 4 years haven't met so many people back there. But a bit terkilan not going to tok long's house (my tok as well). Cried in car on the way back to Pahang.

24/08
1 day trip to UIAM Gombak for the last time. Met Kak Ani, Kak Wiaam and Abg. Khairil. Hope everything goes well after this, insya Allah.

28/08
Left my house to KLIA. CT nurhaliza-Dato' K wedding ceremony and Mawi-Diana talk show were on air. I missed the moment, I missed things that i enjoy most at home, I missed all the warmest memories in my room...

29/08
Flight back to Moscow via Doha, Qatar. 1 day trip to Doha with Meor, Kak Yati, Kak Yani and Thina. Spent time with Dr. Azhar and family in Doha (Ammar Azhar's family - ex-schoolmate). Went to the desert, Sand Dunes. Can't forget the time there.

30/08
Reached Moscow safely.

31/08
National Day in Malaysia. I miss the way YM Tengku Abdul Rahman announced our merdeka day, I miss my parents, I miss my family, I miss everything in Malaysia... At night, I cried...

(September 01, 2006)

The Malaysian Spacedudes

Assalamualaikum wbt.

Luckily I have a few opportunities to spend time with the 1st Malaysian Astronauts. The 1st time was when they were here in Moscow, May 2006. We went to Kremlin, The Old Arbat Street, Victory Park to watch the sunset and the tulips and went to hv dinner in a Korean Restaurant. The 2nd time was when they just got back from the Star City and went to watch Da Vinci Code together. I wasn't joined them for the movie(never been to cinema yet...huhuhu). The next day, they came to my room and we prepared dinner for them. Wah! What a lucky day! The very 1st Malaysian Astronauts came to my room =) Then the next day, we all went for ice skating and did some shopping in Mega Shopping Complex. Sheikh wasn't there because he followed Uncle Zul back to the Star City for some meetings. Only Capten Faiz, Faiz and VJ were there in Mega. Just before going to Mega, we had our brunch (we took late breakfast and lunch together) in their hotel as their special guests. Yummy! The food was ochen kharasho! Enjoy the pics. Will update soon for a few more pics with them during iftar and tarawikh together, in my room again.

p/s: Gambar terabur dan saya dah malas nak edit semula entry lama ni :p

(June 30, 2006)

Memoir of ME (Saat Aku Redah Amukan Hati-SARAH)

Nama saya Sarah
Tanggal 19 itu ku jejak bumi
Bernafas sendiri
Memulakan kemudi
Di dunia tak kekal ini

Ismi Sarah
Belum tua
Tapi sudah punya banyak dosa
Tak terhitung yang mana dan bila
Telah ku hitamkan hati dengan nista
Telah ku conteng mata dengan dunia
Telah ku tutup telinga dengan Jahiliyyah

Menya zavut Sarah
Tak cantik apatah menawan
Inikan pula menjadi pujaan
Dilihat sebagai gilaan
Leganya kerana itu aku bukan

Mein name ist Sarah
Lihat yang lepas sebagai semalam
Lihat yang kini bukan pualam
Lihat yang depan dengan gumam
Ilmu belum penuh dalam genggam
Ada cita mahukan di hati ia berbekam

Je m'appelle Sarah
Mahu cecah ke sana
Lepasi sirat yang lurus dengan selamatnya
Makanya tercari -cari aku formula
Yang bisa kaburkan hatiku dari dunia
Jernihkan juga mata dan telinga

Je irimen Sarah imnida
Hati belum jernih
Tiba-tiba timbul kasih
Aku tak layak, masih!
Aku tak kuat, masih!
Aku takut hanyut, lalu tak bersih!

Watashi Sarah
Kapalku sedepa cuma baru bergerak
Sudah ku hitung bila sauh akan menjejak
Sungguh aku ini tidak bijak
Menghitung tidak, mengukur tidak
Cuma sekadar mengagak
Apa aku fikir aku ini ahli falak?
Lihat saja ke langit, terukir seribu watak?
Lalu bisa kalahkan nujum untuk mengagak?
Sungguh, aku ini masih budak-budak

Mere nam Sarah
Kapal yang ku hanyutkan itu
Bukan cuma seorang aku
Aku punya pembantu
Pengemudi bertauliah anugerah Yang Satu
Yang sentiasa khabarkan padaku
Arah angin yang harus kutuju
Ribut yang dielak perlu
Semilir yang rajin datang menyapaku
Bayu yang kadang-kadang lalu

My name is Sarah
Itulah Al-Quran lafaz agung Tuhan
Itulah Sunnah wasiat Rasul junjungan


(June 12, 2006)

Kullu Ra'sun Masulun 'An Ra'iyyatihi....

Assalamualaikum wbt

Temporary HC for IMAM-MMA has completed their works. Promotions have been done. People became familiar with IMAM already. 1st Annual Meeting has been set up. Everybody has been informed about it. And the day finally came.

"Al-deenu al-nasiihah, al-deenu al-nasiihah, a-deenu al-nasihah" (the religion is the advise, ISLAM is advise, ISLAM is advise) [HR Muslim]

And because of it, I promised to dedicate my life to work for Islam to the most that I can.

And because of it, I promised to run the position that has been given to me : Vise President of Islamic Medical Association of Malaysia-Moscow Student Chapter (Moscow Medical Academy ) [ IMAM-MSC (MMA) ].

Ya abishala shto budu rabotat dlya Islama i cdelayu lucshe chem shto cdelala ranshe...

Paka uzhe 2.30am utra, hachu spat nu prosta paka ne magu...no zaftra u menya zanyatiye budet v 9 chisov. Nada spat seichas.(Russian) [Now its already 2.30am, I wanna sleep but simply cant do it... but tomorrow I have class at 9am. Got to go to bed now.]

Auf wiedersehen!(Germany) [See u later!]


(April 8, 2006)

Zahirnya Satu Usaha, Tiang Buat Agama

Assalamualaikum wbt

Dated on Feb 23rd, i've been noticed to find a new apartment instead of prolonging my contract wit d same landlord...how cruel she was! she gave me only 5 days to find a new place n after managing to find a new 1, in Varshavskoe Shosse, quite an elite area, d 3 of us moved there n our deposit hadnt been returned! it's 550usd maaa...hmm...i hate russians..i know its not good to judge them only by meeting a very certain of them who did unpleasant things to me. but u know, i've never ever been thru this thing before n it sounds like im an immigran here.. move here n there.. what the stupid russians think abt us? why they r so unfair? d rental for russians r mush cheaper compared to d rental for foreigners??! i've gone thru my agent but at this moment, she said that d contract is on d landlord's side!

But thanks ALLAH... after all the hardness in d new apartment, i managed to move in back to hostel... i met a new community... who is so nice n supportive... i've got d chance to know wani, emy, pena, diba n fatt more. we r now a happy family in this house, 205@Spartivnaya Hostel. Thanks ALLAH...

Everything happened for a reason. Since i moved in back, i started to b very busy wit PPIM (Islamis Medical Association of Malaysia-IMAM)...to b in hostel brings me d oppotunity to b close wit d other studnts n to run this IMAM actively.

And now on, i dedicated my life to IMAM, to improve our islamic society n thus to bring up our right as muslims in this cold-windy Russia.

Terima kasih to very specific friends who r alwys wit me, who lend me their shoulders for me to cry to, who have spent credits to call me, who alyws pray for me, for my strenght to stand up in hardness, to smile in difficulty, to stand still when im down...u know who u r..

(March 28, 2006)

Doa Rabitah Hati

Hati ini telah bersatu
Berkumpul di perut bumiMu
Hati ini telah berpadu
Bersatu memikul beban dakwahMu
Hati ini telah mengikat setia
Untuk mendaulat untuk mendukung
SyariatMu di alam maya
Maka Ya Allah eratkanlah
Ikatan yang ada
Maka Ya Allah eratkanlah
Ikatan yang ada

Kekalkan kemesraan yang ada
Tunjukkanlah jalan yang benar
Tunjukkanlah dengan cahayaMu
Tiada malap terangi alamMu
Hidup suburkanlah dengan ma'rifatMu
Tapi jika ingin mematikannya
Matikanlah sebagai syuhada'
Dalam perjuangan menegakkan
Agama yang mulia
Dalam perjuangan menegakkan
Agama yang mulia

-tringat dulu2 wkt f4 d kisas dorm E-26, dayah muji n aimi slalu ajar kitorg sume nasyid ni..actly ni nasyid SMKA kuala slangor. to shafiq (kalau baca), jgn ingt akak x tau nasyid ni eh...best sgt kn...doa yg tggi perngaharapannya dr seorg hamba mcm kite ni.....

-Kami@gazebo KISAS wkt reunion team bahas 01/02-

-me n kak ani@UIA-

-me n khaliz@UIA...my buddy in bahas-

-my abg wan, sifu in bahas-

-best friends...faiq,dayah,sarah-

-best friends in moscow..nurul nadiah,sarah,nadia hamimah-

(taken from my former blog in my Friendster page, March 19, 2006)